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Mother: Son, this morning I cleaned your room and found a pornographic book under your mattress.
Son: (Uh oh!)
Mother: After all the trouble we went to, bringing you up to be honest and decent and you bring home such utter garbage. I flicked through it, and it was full of the most gratuitously sexually explicit, degrading, violent, sexist content ever imaginable. Where did you get such tripe from?
Son: Well, I was at the mall and this strange man dressed in weird clothes gave it to me. And he said that he could take me to a special place where I can find out more about that stuff, but I thought better and just came home.
Mother: I'm certainly glad you had the presence of mind not to accompany that despicable man. As for the Bible though, your father tore it up and threw it in the furnace.