We are assuming that His Lordship has been holed up in a casino for the past few billion years and decides to show himself. Could this be how it all really turns out?
God:
"Whew, does time fly when you're having fun but I came out ahead so I thought I would put some of my winnings towards planet Earth. And what the heck is all this Jesus Christ stuff I heard about when I got in today?
Turn my back for a while and some bugger comes along claiming to be my son and conning everyone to idolize him for ever and a day. I don't have a son but I have 72 daughters (Christians, are you getting worried?) and there ain't nobody going to touch them.
So you can get rid of those pigswill worship places and stop all that nancy-schmancy prayer stuff because it just doesn't work. I wouldn't know one person from another and quite frankly I don't give a stuff anyway.
All I wanted was a few plants and animals, you know, to make the place look good. I go away for a couple of billion years and how was I to know all this evolution crap would start happening and a few apes started getting swollen heads?
Well it has happened and as far as I'm concerned, all you humans are just the same as any other animal, you have a big brain, now live with it because I am doing nobody no favors and there is nobody going to come up to my Heaven and start clogging up my space....just not going to happen, ok?
Anyway, I've changed my mind. Believe it or not, there has been a lot going under the bridge over the past 13 billion years. I just don't have the nouse to do a major reno on this screwed up planet anyway, I mean, what's with all this dog eat dog business?
I'd be much better off spending my mullah on another universe and start all over again, so I'll just leave all you buggers alone to drown in your own crap.....oh here's my limo. Err, driver?...Back to the casino if you don't mind, I need to win a bit more for my next project"
God:
"Whew, does time fly when you're having fun but I came out ahead so I thought I would put some of my winnings towards planet Earth. And what the heck is all this Jesus Christ stuff I heard about when I got in today?
Turn my back for a while and some bugger comes along claiming to be my son and conning everyone to idolize him for ever and a day. I don't have a son but I have 72 daughters (Christians, are you getting worried?) and there ain't nobody going to touch them.
So you can get rid of those pigswill worship places and stop all that nancy-schmancy prayer stuff because it just doesn't work. I wouldn't know one person from another and quite frankly I don't give a stuff anyway.
All I wanted was a few plants and animals, you know, to make the place look good. I go away for a couple of billion years and how was I to know all this evolution crap would start happening and a few apes started getting swollen heads?
Well it has happened and as far as I'm concerned, all you humans are just the same as any other animal, you have a big brain, now live with it because I am doing nobody no favors and there is nobody going to come up to my Heaven and start clogging up my space....just not going to happen, ok?
Anyway, I've changed my mind. Believe it or not, there has been a lot going under the bridge over the past 13 billion years. I just don't have the nouse to do a major reno on this screwed up planet anyway, I mean, what's with all this dog eat dog business?
I'd be much better off spending my mullah on another universe and start all over again, so I'll just leave all you buggers alone to drown in your own crap.....oh here's my limo. Err, driver?...Back to the casino if you don't mind, I need to win a bit more for my next project"
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